On Purpose

“If you want something that bad, arrange to have it come to your house. You have more money than God!” This was Mom’s take on Robert Kraft this week and I’ll let you figure out the “it” that she was referring to. These are the things that get discussed at our dinner table. That and how old “sayings” are oftentimes found be to completely inappropriate. I won’t even say what sayings I’m referring to, they’re that bad.

Our nightly dinners really are something to behold here. Somehow, a multigenerational family of six has found a rhythm to life that is almost always punctuated with a nightly gathering in our dining room. Isaac entertains and says whatever comes to his mind, Maire and J.D. argue about something, I distract them from an impending brawl, and Dad practically finishes his dinner before Mom has even sat down. With David Muir, Wheel of Fortune, and Jeopardy playing in the background (sometimes on two different TVs), we discuss the day’s events and, if we’re lucky, Mom and Dad share a story about how things once were. A most nontraditional family has forged a very traditional routine. And, for the most part, it’s working.

When we lived on Kaua`i, I worked at a small independent school where my job was to help the school rebrand itself and raise money. The focus of the rebrand was always on the school’s mission statement that was about teaching kids to live a life of purpose or something like that. But there I was, 6000 miles from “home”, living a life that felt…purposeless. Then Mom got diagnosed with cancer, lung cancer no less, and that purposelessness started to sting a little too much. So, like boomerangs, we came back. And though we were broken, somehow it all felt right.

My “life of purpose”, it turns out, is found at our dinner table. Every night, we tether ourselves to our roots and experience what it means to truly care. The challenges we face in this home of many ages are outshone by the distinct beauty of what transpires through sharing a meal. Paradise is great for vacation and all but real life, the gritty stuff, is where true purpose is found. So tomorrow, with the soothing sound of David Muir in the background, this quirky little family will sit, break bread, and talk about our days. And the trees surrounding our house will sway in silent approval as we adhere to their example. The roots have always had me and it looks like they always will.